In this short gospel passage, Jesus admonishes his disciples after washing their feet, “I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another. This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
Love has so many meanings. There is puppy love when we find our hearts swept away by someone else, known otherwise as infatuation. I remember girls from my childhood whom I was madly in love with. What Jesus speaks of, however, is not infatuation. Instead, he speaks of agape, that quality of deep love, where one puts the needs of others ahead of oneself. That is the kind of love he has for us. For many people, that initial experience of puppy love has grown into real love because they have indeed put the needs of others ahead of themselves.
Katherine Hepburn once commented, “Few people know what they mean when they say, ‘I love you.’ Well, what does the word love mean? It means total interest. I think the reason very few people really fall in love with anyone is they’re not willing to pay the price. The price is you have to adjust yourself to them.”
Speaking of adjustments, I have a confession to make. I am no longer living alone. I now have a housemate living in the rectory with me. Her name is Amber. This blond has green eyes and is so affectionate. Any chance she has, she loves to be on my lap and be caressed. I never imagined that the day would come that this life long bachelor would find himself sharing his home with a cat. I quickly learned that I had to adjust my life accordingly.
To truly love someone, we have to put our priorities aside. Some relationships begin with one or both persons asking themselves, “What is in this for me?” But that is not the manner of love which Jesus is speaking of here. When it comes to loving us, he didn’t ask that question. Instead, the question should be, “What can I do for the person whom I love? How willing am I to adjust my life for the sake of the person whom I love?” For most of us who love someone dearly, the answer is much. When we really love someone, we are willing to go the extra mile and in some instances, go so far as to give our lives. Many parents and spouses have made such adjustments for the well being of those whom they love. They understand what Jesus and Katherine Hepburn are saying here; hence they do not hesitate to put aside their self interests for the sake of those whom they love.
Katherine Hepburn also had this to say about love. “Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get…only what you are expecting to give, which is everything. What you will receive in return varies. But it really has no connection with what you give. You give because you love and cannot help giving. If you are very lucky, you may be loved back. That is delicious, but it does not necessarily happen.”
One modern day saint demonstrated that attitude often. Mother Theresa of Calcutta spent many years caring for the dying in the streets of Calcutta. Once a journalist watched as she tended to a dying man who had a wound that oozed decay, giving off a foul smell. She calmly washed the wound, all the while speaking softly to the man. He told her that he would not have done that for all the gold in the world. Mother Theresa replied, “Neither would I.” She did it for someone worth more than that. While you and I are not Blessed Theresa of Calcutta, Jesus still calls us to a similar love.
I think of spouses who honor the vows they shared years ago, caring for the person whom they married who is now terminally ill. I think of adult children going the extra mile to care for an elderly parent ill with dementia. I think of parents who have made personal sacrifices for the sake of their children. Yet, I know Jesus is calling us to do more than that. He is calling on us to love even those whom we do not know.
One striking feature of the early church was the love its members showed for one another. They understood Paul’s advice, “It is necessary for us to undergo many hardships to enter the kingdom of God.” What was true then remains true today.
This weekend we are called to support those who care for the needy in our name. Besides the formation of our seminarians, and the marriage tribunal, the Annual Catholic Appeal supports those who reach out to the poor on our behalf. For example, last year Catholic Community Services prepared and served over a million meals. They helped more than 78,000 clients, including some here on South Whidbey. In addition, your pledge supports hospital and prison chaplains. In short, the Annual Catholic Appeal enables every one of us to do our part in fulfilling Jesus’ commandment to love one another as he has loved us. We can all do our part if we are willing to make an adjustment to our priorities for no gift is too small. Every pledge makes a difference to someone somewhere in Western Washington.
This year, our parish goal is $42,554. Last year 211 parishioners pledged an average of $276. Join me now in completing a pledge envelope, if you haven’t already. Keep in mind as you fill out your envelope that your gift can be paid over a period of time with monthly billing from the chancery, a credit or debit card, or electronic fund transfer. The suggested chart is asking you to consider pledging 1 % of your household earnings. As I have said in the past, any amount received beyond our goal is returned to the parish; that amount will go toward a new organ.
If you choose not to make a gift, at least complete the envelope so that we know that you have responded to the Archbishop’s appeal. Thank you for your pledge; your gift, whatever its size, helps us to make real God’s kingdom in our midst.