A fellow walked into a doctor’s office and the receptionist asked him what had. He replied, “Shingles.” So she took down his name, address, medical insurance, and told him to have a seat. Fifteen minutes later, a nurse’s aide came out and asked him what he had. He said, “Shingles.”
So she noted his height, weight, and complete medical history then told him to wait in the examining room. A half hour later a nurse asked him what he had and again he replied, “Shingles.” So she took his blood pressure and told him to wait for the doctor. Thirty minutes later, the doctor came in and asked what he had. Once again, he said, “Shingles.” The doctor asked, “Where?” “Outside in the truck. Where do you want them?”
Like everyone in the doctor’s office who never considered what else the word shingles could mean, we often limit our perception of a message, hearing only want we want to hear and not hearing what the speaker intended. In the story of Lazarus being raised from the dead, our first inclination is to think that what happened to Lazarus will happen to us.
Martha speaks for us when she tells Jesus, “I know my brother will rise in the resurrection on the last day.” We also believe our lives will be transformed and Jesus affirms that when he tells her, “I am the resurrection and the life; whoever believes in me, even if he dies, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.”
The promise of new life waiting us beyond our physical death must not taken for granted. To cross the threshold of heaven, we must be forgiven. For this reason, we often implore God to forgive us, such as when we say the Lord’s Prayer and ask, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”
The not so obvious message in today’s readings is the need to initiate reconciliation when we have been wronged. I am drawn to the command Jesus gives at the end of the gospel. “Untie him and let him go.” How often have we figuratively tied up and left for dead someone whom we refuse to forgive in spite of that promise we make in the Lord’s Prayer?
Jesus assures Martha and he assures us that if we believe in him, we will live. If we do believe in him, then we must forgive, and in the act of forgiving, of untying and letting go, we will find new life in this lifetime.
Broken relationships, even simple misunderstandings, can result in much hurt, despair, grief and/or anger. This can be as painful, if not more so than mourning a physical death, much less coping with shingles. In the wake of a break-up, feelings of anger and hatred can leave a stench, so to speak. Let them remain buried is the reaction I sometimes encounter when someone is reluctant to forgive past hurts. Those who have taken the time to look at their past and extend forgiveness by letting go of ill feelings are blessed with new life. Alan Paton, an author from South Africa, wisely observed, “When an injury is done to us, we never recover until we forgive.”
When we estrange ourselves from someone, we are left with two options. We can let the relationship die, becoming a grave full of painful memories, or we can forgive, which is the first step toward reconciliation.
Forgiveness, however, is not the same as forgetting. In his book, Strength to Love, Martin Luther King, Jr. noted, “He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love.” The person who was wronged, he pointed out, must always initiate the forgiving act. “Forgiveness,” he wrote, “doesn’t mean ignoring what has been done or putting a false label on an evil act. It means rather, that the evil act no longer remains a barrier to the relationship. Forgiveness is a catalyst creating the atmosphere necessary for a fresh start and a new beginning.”
Granted we may not forget what was done but when we forgive, somehow the evil deed is no longer a mental block impeding a new relationship. Forgiveness means coming together again, knowing that the wrongful act never expressed all that the person you are forgiving was or is. God knows that there is some evil in the best of us but also that there is some good in the worst of us, thus God is always willing to forgive and urges us to do the same.
Each of us must understand that our time in this world is so short, that darkening it with useless arguments, jealousy, not forgiving others, discontentment and bad attitudes are a waste of time and energy. Did someone insult you without reason? Stay calm and move on. Did a neighbor make a comment that you didn’t like? Stay calm. Ignore it. Our trip together in this lifetime is too short. In the time we have left, let us appreciate friends and family, be respectful, kind and forgiving. Because we will be filled with gratitude and joy, after all when we get to our ultimate destination, endless life with Christ in the eternal kingdom.